Gratitude

I don’t routinely read the New Yorker. But on Sunday a story from the New Yorker was featured on the news and it piqued my interest. The piece was written by Tatiana Schlossberg, daughter of Caroline Kenney Schlossberg, granddaughter of former President John F. Kennedy. Tatiana is the shy member of the Kennedy family who worked quietly behind the scenes. She is a science and climate reporter for the New York Times and has written several books about the environment. She had planned to write a book on the oceans, but that project will never come to fruition because Tatiana is in her last months of life. On May 25, 2024, Tatiana and her husband George welcomed a new baby girl into their family; a perfect complement to their two-year-old son. What joy!… until Tatiana’s bloodwork came back showing a high white blood cell count. The doctors repeated the test and included others, and by the next morning Tatiana was being moved from maternity to oncology, diagnosed with Acute Myeloid Leukemia. Treatment started immediately, leaving no time to enjoy their newborn. Since then, Tatiana and her doctors have been in a battle against a rare mutation of this disease that makes it virtually incurable.

The article chronicles her journey: chemotherapy, a bone marrow transplant, remission, and then the cancer returned. More chemo and another bone marrow transplant, remission, and then the cancer returned. The doctors at Memorial Sloan Kettering tried one trial after the next, each harsh to endure, and ultimately a failure. Now, at 35 years old, she is seeing the last of her days. How hard for a mother to say goodbye to her children. Tatiana writes, “When my doctor told me that he could keep me alive for a year, maybe, my thought was that my kids, whose faces live permanently on the inside of my eyelids, wouldn’t remember me.” The article is heart-wrenching. But interwoven in her prose, Tatiana shares celebrations. She writes, “I have never encountered a group of people who are more competent, more full of grace and empathy, more willing to serve others than nurses.” She is grateful for her doctors who, “scoured every inch of the earth for more treatments.” She celebrates her daughter, with a head full of red curls, who likes to walk around the house in yellow rainboots. She celebrates her family who stepped up to care for the children. And woven throughout the article is a celebration of her husband, who she describes as “a kind, funny, handsome genius.”

Gratitude in the midst of the brokenness of life…

Last week, I sat with a man who was recently diagnosed with dementia. He still drives and participates in family life and church, but he knows what is coming. We talked about next steps and good resources, but I can’t protect this loving couple from the path that lies before them. They love the life they share. It’s good and comfortable. The prospect of losing this joy is hard to face. But in the midst of a hard pastoral visit, he flashed a smile and said, “I am so blessed.” Then he went on to share the blessings… the woman at his side whom he calls his “angel”, his family, his church family. Our time together ended on that high note of gratitude.

Gratitude in the midst of the brokenness of life…

Yesterday, I sat with the oldest member of our faith community. She is 101 years old and still lives independently in her own home. Every year, before Thanksgiving, her family gathers to decorate her home with a collection of 35 Christmas trees, each with their own theme. Every nook and cranny of her home has a tree or a Christmas village. It is a Christmas wonderland! This Thanksgiving, she was to host 25 of her family for a feast made by her oldest grandson. She loves the family gathered. But this year, she will be in the hospital, fighting an infection after surgery. So, the family has gathered from all over the world, not for a feast, but to give back just a little of the love she has poured out for them over the years. Her struggle is hard and the disappointment of missing the joy in her home is real. I was there to help her with those hard realities. But she was more interested in telling me how blessed she is… recounting one blessing after the next.

Gratitude in the midst of the brokenness of life…

I am learning this lesson as I struggle with my own health. It is easy to feel overwhelmed by the tests and doctor’s visits and hospital stays. But each time I turn my mind and heart to counting my blessings, my spirit is light. So, today I choose to be grateful. I am grateful for my life partner who is kind and gentle when I am struggling, determined when I want to avoid, patient and long-suffering, and always at my side. God gave me the gift of my husband when I was too young and stupid to know what to look for. I marvel everyday at the gift. I am grateful for my family and the many ways they have rallied for us during this health challenge. Each sweet granddaughter is a healing balm. I am grateful for a hard-working staff, who keep trying to take things off my plate so that I can rest. I am grateful for a faith community, who have swamped my home with Hallmark cards, and spent untold hours in prayer for my healing. I am grateful for the doctors and nurses seeking the right healing path. Most of all I am grateful for our God who is ever-faithful, and always good.

I hope that you will take time this Thanksgiving to give thanks. Count your blessings!

With you, growing a grateful heart,
Anita